Rainy Daze...

Today, here in NJ, it was a beautiful day. The sun finally came out and things dried up from 4 days of rain. Even the temperature got up to 70 degrees! (just right!)

The past 4 rainy days I found myself drawn back to the story I wrote a few years ago and I began to try yet another edit. I've gone thru 6 chapters trying to make the wording flow better and checking for more typos etc. Instead of beginning with the first "book" of the trilogy, I began with the last, hoping that taking things out of context might help .

It's strange to me.. I mean, I'm not what would be called a writer, not really. I not a person who has dreamed of becoming an author or becoming famous for writing. But somehow this story came out of me. Though it's fantasy-fiction, like most things there is much in it that can relate to "truths". And so as I "re-read" this third book, I find that at times I smile, and at times I cry. I know it's not because "it's that good".. but because I must read into it what it says to me, and all the while wonder if it would ever mean anything to anyone else.

Today while working on fixing a chapter I cried. I cried because I knew the true feelings of things being said. "if it were me".. seems to fill the reasoning. "I know how I'd be feeling, if it were me".. and I cried.

I wish I knew if I was making the story any better by doing this. It sure isn't the first time I've tried working on it to improve it.. This will be (I think) the 4th or 5th self-editing.

I didn't start out to do this, I'm not even sure why I opened the first chapter a few days ago, but I did. And because of it I'm afraid my journal has suffered.. I noticed I've put up more photo's and not much writing to go with them. I hope to correct that.. though it's hard for me to "switch subjects" after spending time in an imaginary place, with imaginary characters.. maybe I just need to be somewhere I'm not .. and maybe that's what I wrote the story for.. my escape.

Now, see.. if I were a real writer.. I'd escape (write) to new places and meet new characters, but this place (Kesterwood) and these characters (quite a few) keep drawing me back to them. If I ever figure out why, I'll let you know ... I've left links before to drawings and some things I did for the story but for anyone new here are some links to see some characters I drew and even a few chapters (they are not the last edit)

http://www.geocities.com/kesterwoodgirl/kesterwoodart.html

http://www.geocities.com/deslily/kesterwoodcover.html

Meanwhile... the dwarf lilac bush has all bloomed and even beginning to loose the flowers already.. I did get one last photo of part of it...

These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I
go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.