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Location: Vero Beach, Florida, United States

My name is Pat and I live in Florida. My skin will never be smooth again and my hair will never see color. I enjoy collecting autographs and playing in Paint Shop Pro.,along with reading and writing. Sometimes, I enjoy myself by doing volunteer "work" helping celebrities at autograph shows. I love animals and at one time I did volunteer work for Tippi Hedren's Shambala Preserve.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Stuff

Lately it seems, that some blogs are talking about things they have. (Naomi is showing her library and Chris some new acquisitions..his stuff. And Carl is excited over some of his pride and joys!) Pictures, Books etc. and what they mean to them..
I thought I'd put my 2 cents worth...
Stuff... those are the things you surround yourself with, that for some unexplainable reason mean something to you... and you may not even be able to explain why. We all have them, and sometimes you don't even realize you do until for some reason they are gone.
Stuff, should not really mean that much to us.. after all, before you obtained it, you got along just fine without it. And should it be gone, be it stolen, sold, lost in a fire, we do survive without it.
So, when I had to sell some of my stuff in order to keep surviving in California, why did it then feel as if I was chipping away at who and what I am?
Other than something horrific, such as a death of someone close, why did I cry as I sold it? Why do I, even today, miss it? Not everything can be replaced... well, not in your heart anyway. Yes you can replace most stuff but it's never the same as when you first realized the stuff you had was actually a part of who you were.
Most people, if they are fortunate enough to get warning that a disaster is approaching, such as a hurricane, will grab their photo albums to save, since it really is something that cannot be replaced. You can't go back and get childhood photo's when the kids are now adults, or family outings when some of the family is now gone. Photo's are a major part of stuff...... yet if we do loose them, we go on. We can live without them. But a sadness remains for all time.
But the stuff I had to sell to keep myself from becoming a street person still meant a lot to me, and I still think of it, and still wish I had them.
Much of what I sold pertained to my collections of stuff. Autographed photo's that I had been collecting just about forever, along with books and movies. Just stuff right? So why should I still miss them? I can replace many of the books... but now they aren't the originals, with the original art work on them. Some autographs I can replace, but some I cannot because that person is no longer with us. Movies can be replaced too.. so why is it that as I sold each item I felt like I was a statue that was being chipped away with each item that left my apartment?
Stuff shouldn't mean that much to anyone, should it?
Of course I know that getting by is more important... if I didn't I never would have sold the items. I know that health and well being are more important. Many things are much more important than stuff is. (and I am aware of this fact!)
But still, at times I find myself looking at some of my stuff and relating to it in such a way that I know it's part of who I am. And I wonder, would someone else feel the same way about a book they read, or a movie they watched, or an autograph they managed to get? Is it wrong? Is it shallow?
I think the bottom line.. for me ... is that, stuff isn't so much important as it is a reflection of who we are. When someone is around you, and see's your stuff it helps in knowing that person.
When you first see or meet a person they are judged on looks. (hopefully we all know how shallow THAT is!) It isn't until we actually get to know the person (and their stuff) that we like or dislike who and what they are.
So maybe stuff does have a meaning to the whole picture... ya think?


Addendum: Sorry if you get two alerts but after I posted my stuff it came to me why it's so important to me. (ME being the operative word)

I think my stuff means a lot to me because: I've been at the other end. And I expect to be there again one day. But, for now.. the fact that I may give up something I need in order to get myself some stuff is (besides wanting/ liking it) because it proves to me that life isn't so bad right now. It could be worse. I could be selling, not buying. So when I look at my stuff I smile, 'cause for now... life is ok, ya know?... and I really like my stuff!

7 Comments:

Blogger Chris said...

So well put Deslily. ((hugs)) You seem to have some great stuff. Love those dragons! They're amazing. It really is a funny thing how we attach to things that we once lived without or to things that have little value to anyone else. But we do...and like you said, our attachment to our stuff is what makes each of us unique. Great post!

4:47 PM  
Blogger Carl V. said...

Nicely shared. And great pics of your 'stuff'.

I think people sometimes misinterpret the idea that we shouldn't be attached to things. I think we shouldn't be so attached to our worldly possessions that they take the place of relationships with others, and I don't think we should be so attached that we are unwilling to part with them in states of emergency, etc.

That being said, I think it is important to acknowledge the link to our identity that our possessions have. For me, my home, the way it is decorated, the items I have collected and surrounded myself with, are as much a part of me and a reflection of me as my inner thoughts, motivations, etc are. And much of the decoration is also representative of shared interests that my wife and I have...interests that have grown and been cultivated mutually during our time together.

Those things are important. They make an opening statement to those we allow into our homes, and our lives, about some of who we are. This gives us and them a foundation upon which to begin conversation and build relationship.

I miss stuff I no longer have as well. There are books that I got rid of in college that I would give anything to have back. They were precious to me and I was stupid. I have copies of those same books now, but they are not the same. My more treasured memories are tied to the originals. If I could only go back and erase that stupid, I'm only thinking of the moment, period of my life.

Again, great thoughts. Thanks for sharing.

2:17 AM  
Blogger Dark Orpheus said...

Hi Deslily, I love your Dragonlance hardcovers - and your dragons.

Your post on "Stuff" set me thinking - a few years back I started tossing out things I thought I no longer need. I was unsatisfied with my life and wanted to try to "declutter" my life.

I thought my possessions have started to possess me.

I got rid of my old paperbacks of the Dragonlance series - the ones I first read when I was 15. Since then I've regretted throwing them away. The old DragonLance novels represented a part of my childhood that was long gone. I could buy new ones - maybe even get the nifty hardcovers - but the fact is, the original paperbacks I first read were gone.

It's just like you said: It's not about the physical "stuff" - it's about what the stuff represent about you.

3:47 AM  
Blogger Lee said...

I love my "stuff"...I would feel naked without all my bits, pieces, paintings, books etc. They are part of who I am...and if others think I have too much "stuff"...tough! I'm the one who lives with it, not them! ;)

4:22 AM  
Blogger DesLily said...

Chris: yes, I still have some "stuff"..but I had to sell much of it to keep going for a while. Some can never be replaced. I don't regret it, in that it did help when I needed it..to an extent anyway.

Carl: oh no..when it comes down to the nitty gritty.. stuff isn't important..but while it's there it's sure nice lol. I still have many movies (vhs format unfortunately..but I could NEVER afford to replace them with dvds!) and a good number of books..but still a lot less than I had once.. some of my autographs can never be replaced though..sigh

hello and welcome Dark Orpheus:oh wow.. i still have my original paperback Dragonlance series!.. the reason I got the hardbacks was because they have turned quite tan on the pages (and I've gained an eye problem so hardbacks are easier to read) I've toyed with getting rid of them, but the first trilogy my son gave me..hard to toss out,even if they are brown and brittle. The hardbacks are great ...one of the six is hard to come by though. I did get these new thru Amazon (test of the twins is the hard one just in case you decide to replace yours.. you may have to wait nearly 2 months for that one book.. the rest come fairly easy)

Hi Lee: yes, no one can say others have "too much stuff".. except me! LOL.. but that's just where I live... with my brother and David..over the years they collected many things that need dusting and cleaning..since my brother is now disabled that is a lot of work. I think we all get just as much as the individual can deal with when it comes to the work part lol.. one adjusts as its accumulated.. I walked into it and it's overwhelming for me even after 7 yrs here. (plus i'm old now and wanting LESS work not more!) haha

7:38 AM  
Blogger Carl V. said...

I was thinking about the whole 'decluttering' process the other day and while I believe that may involve getting rid of some 'things', I certainly don't feel it should involve getting rid of things we treasure...should just be the junk that clutters are lives.

I guess if a person was too involved in the past and not really 'living' then maybe that kind of thing would be cathartic. I hope I don't get to that point. I'd be missing my stuff too much. ;)

8:23 AM  
Blogger DesLily said...

Carl: yes, decluttering can mean a host of things.. you can ease your work and still not get rid of "stuff".. like books need dusting, well..get or make a bookshelf with glass doors on them.. much less dusting!.. I think I may talk some more on how it was when I was selling off some of my possessions today... and the frame of mind I had to force upon myself to keep going..

8:48 AM  

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